Bill is an executive at WhiteHat Security in Silicon Valley with a wife, a daughter and a second child on the way.

He has been in tech ever since he got his first computer, a Vic-20, 23 years ago. He has co-authored three books on information security and runs the Grumpy Security Guy blog.

In his one hour of free time a month he enjoys kayak fishing, photography and skateboarding.

The other day I shared my thoughts about work life balance and blogging with Bill over at HiTech Dad. Now it is Bill’s turn to be on the hot-seat as he shares a few of his thoughts and experiences.

Can you please tell me a little about your family? How many kids do you have? How old are they?

I have a daughter Lily who will be 2 at the end of December and I have a son that will be born January 28th (got to love that c-section scheduling!)

Can you provide a little bit of background on your career and professional interests?

I have been in I.T. and I.T. security for and insanely long time. I started working when I was 16, got into tech when I was 18 and really just performed various positions in and around the tech space since then. That is about 18 years now.

I am currently VP of Services at a company specializing in web site security where I run operations, development, I.T. and product management. Yes I have a hat rack in my cube.

How would you define work-life balance?

For me it is all about control. Being able to be where you need to be when you need to be there. If I need to be in the office or on a conference call early in the morning I need support from my wife to get Lily up and off to day care. If I need to be home for a day to watch Lily when she is sick or I need to attend some day care function then I want my work to support me then as well. I am extremely lucky to have support from both those areas.

Do you feel that dads have a harder time achieving work-life balance than moms? If so, how?

I think today it is easier than it used to be. Many families are dual incomes so dads do not have to take on the full burden of providing financially for the family. If I was the sole person bring home a paycheck I would be stressed out. I also think more and more employers are understanding that dads need family time as well and are much more understanding.

What do you personally find is your biggest struggle to achieving a healthy work-life balance?

Being able to switch from work mode to home mode. Since I am in tech I am always connected. I recently “downgraded” from a BlackBerry to a plain old cell phone some I was not always checking my email. I also have a no laptop rule while my daughter is awake (unless we are watching videos on it). Also the cell phone stays in my bag when I am at home, I don’t lug it around with me.

What do you remember from your own childhood with regard to your dad’s work-life balance? Was he around or always busy working? How has that influenced your own views on the subject?

My dad worked a lot when I was young. He was managing a local sporting goods store so he had to work some not fun hours. We did however get to take annual ski trips (which is a bit of a haul since we were in Texas). As I got older my dad started working for himself and he was around a lot more. This really drives home the point of being your own boss and living (and working) on your own terms.

How have you learned to identify when your work-life balance is too far out of balance in one direction?

My wife gives me dirty looks and Lily forgets who I am. Seriously I usually get very grumpy when I don’t have enough family time or me time. That led me to start my “professional” blog Grumpy Security Guy.

What is one of the biggest mistakes that you have made with regard to work-life balance?

Thinking that money is more important than family.

Have you faced any stigmas or criticism for focusing on your own work-life balance? Do you think focusing on your family has impacted your career? If so, how?

I am lucky that my boss has kids so she totally understands. Since I am 2nd in charge we support each other when needs arise. I think I would have a problem if I went someplace else though. I am pretty strict with my separation of work and life and there are still a lot of places that do not support that. That is why my next boss will be me.

What is one thing that you wish you knew at an earlier age with regard to work-life balance? That is to say, what is one piece of advice that you would give to a new dad as he struggles to find his work-life balance?

When you are taking your last breath, do you think you will look back and be happy you spent all that time at work?

How has your work life balance changed since you had kids and do you think it has changed for the better or worse?

Before kids, I am sorry I don’t remember that time Before kids we had a lot more time to do things. I could travel for a few weeks on business and I knew my wife was not going to be too crazy. Now if I am gone overnight I miss them and I know my wife is going to need a break when I get back home.

Do you think your work life balance has changed as your kids have gotten older? How?

Right now it is a lot harder than when Lily was first born. She is now running around, getting into things and requires a lot more energy to keep up with. She is not to the point where you can just set her loose in the house and know she won’t do something crazy like jump off the table. So that impacts my ability to relax to a great deal. I can’t come home and relax like when she was younger and largely immobile.

How important do you think it is to find time for just you and your spouse without the kids?

We are terrible at this. We have gotten out alone maybe 3-4 times since Lily was born. We are having a lot of fun with her around though so I don’t think it is that big of a deal.

What tips do you have to “unplug” from work? Can you completely unplug?

I am fully addicted to the internet but not work. I have a pretty strict work/personal barrier. I try not to hang out with people I work with outside of work cause then we just talk about work, which extends my work day. When I leave work I leave it all behind, trust me it will be there when you get back.

What activities and/or interests do you pursue as a means of relaxation?

I do a lot of kayak fishing and I am about to start skateboarding again after a 5 year hiatus. I will also be getting a new Canon Rebel XTi to go back to my first love, photography.

Bill, thanks for taking the time to share your thoughts and experiences regarding work, family, and how you have learned to find your own work life balance.

Popularity: 3% [?]

If you liked this article, please...
	Subscribe Via Email		Subscribe Via RSS		Add to Technorati

Or read these related articles...