On my personal blog I recently wrote about the precise fertility treatments which lead to our two biological kids — the details of which I had never shared online before. In fact, we hadn’t even told our kids until very recently.
When we adopted our first child, we planned that he would never have a day when he found out he was adopted, he would just always know about it. And it has worked out that way because it is surprisingly easy for even a very young child to understand the basics of adoption. You can explain it in terms of love, sharing, kindness and other emotions and motivations that make sense at an early age.
But what about our other two kids whose conceptions were so much a part of modern medical technology? I couldn’t get past the idea that in order to explain their stories to them, I would have to teach them some basic biology. Consequently, 2.5 year old Chip and 4.5 year old Robbie hadn’t heard their stories.
Until now
I bought a fantastic book called Before You Were Born from a small company in Iowa, and after the first time I read it I was so relieved. Finally an easy, simple way to introduce these concepts to my boys so that they would just always know.
I begrudgingly use the phrase “non-traditional” to describe the conception methods for which they have written books. But here’s a list to give you an idea of what you can expect to find on their web site:
- The Story Of An IVF Baby
- The Story Of A Frozen Embryo
- The Story Of Donor Insemination
- The Story Of A Donor Egg
- The Story Of Donor Sperm (IVF)
- The Story Of A Gestational Carrier
- The Story Of Surrogacy
- The Story Of A Donor Embryo
- A Baby Conceived For Female Partners
- A Baby Conceived For Male Partners
- Single Mom – Donor Insemination
- Single Mom – IVF using Donor Sperm
- Single Mom - Embryo Donation (Adoption)
- Single Mom - Donor Sperm/Donor Egg
- Single Dad – Traditional Surrogate
- Single Dad - Donor egg / Gestational Carrier
I wholeheartedly recommend these sweet simple books as springboards for talks with your kids about their genetic origins, and our kids like them too.
Image © 2004 Janice Grimes.
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oh my this is awesome!
my youngest is adopted too and like you we have made no secret about it. still i don’t think he grasps that…he doesn’t even seem to be concerned about where babies come from, perhaps because he doesn’t care for babies. i am always looking for ways to talk about how he completed our family and this is definitely something worht looking into.
thanks!